Friday, May 22, 2009

Tunnel Vision

In medical terms, tunnel vision is the loss of peripheral vision with retention of central vision, resulting in a constricted circular tunnel-like field of vision.

Basically, you can not see anything except what is in front of you. This is how I feel about the last 21 days of school right now, which is why my blog has been silent, and will be until I reach this plateau in front of me.

Why do I choose the word plateau? Because I still have my goal of getting my BA one day. Of course I leave this all in the Lords hands. If that's not where He wants me, He'll open another door for me. Which is why I'm taking a pause in between my SVC graduation and applying to WSU or another 4 year school. It also comes at a good time economically. Right now schools in WA, that is government funded colleges, are making cutbacks and securing up funds and enrollment in order to save money in the budget. It's sad, but these are the times we live in. Also, me being the planner that I am, I need to come up with an idea of how I'm going to go forward from this point on, w/o accumulating insane amounts of student debt. Yes, I have my GI Bill money, but I still need to have the money upfront for the first few semesters, then the VA will reimburse me.

But in the tunnel is where I am, my cocoon of solitude and barreling straight towards the "finish line". I haven't really hung out with any of my friends lately, and I feel really bad about that. I feel blessed that they understand, but I can't completely alienate them, otherwise I'll have no friends to return to. For those friends of mine that reading this and feeling ignored, I'm sorry. We only have 21 days until we can hopefully start hanging out again. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and it's name is AAUCT (Associate in Arts University and College Transfer) degree.


countrygirl85 said...

:)What are friends for? We understand that sometimes we all find ourselves being secluded in order to accomplish something. These periods are temporary. When they are over, we miss you so much that it doesn't matter how long we were a part. 21 days or not, it's really cool that you are completing something so many have started and laid by the wayside. Wish I could be at graduation :) See ya when I get back. :) Miss ya much.... Sandi

Engrafted Lives said...

It won't be too much longer and you will have that degree in hand. Keep hanging on, you are almost there.


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